The comedian Louis Anderson once made a joke saying, “The trouble with air travel these days is that it’s too cheap….there are people flying who should be taking the bus”.

If you’re a frequent flyer, you get to see some pretty strange things supporting this belief. Coming home from Toronto today on Porter Airways, I was in line to board the plane, pass and photo I.D. in hand as required. The man in front of me handed his boarding pass to the agent, but didn’t have his photo I.D. handy. He had to fumble for his wallet and then riffle through it for 30 seconds trying to find his driver’s license. They only remind you about ten times to have your boarding pass and I.D ready while you’re in the waiting room!

Once on board, we took our seats. As other passengers boarded, it became clear that the aforementioned gentleman was in the wrong seat. He got up and moved to another seat (still not his own) further to the front of the plane. The flight attendant told him that there was too much weight up front (these are smaller prop-jobs), and offered him another seat further back, completely unoccupied so that he would have lots of room (the flight was pretty empty so there were lots of double empty seats). Instead, he now went back to his original seat and squished himself next to the other passenger in the adjoining seat.

Then are are the Great Narcissists who put their large carry-on bags in the Business Class overhead compartment before moving to the back of the plane! Makes sense….why have to carry your bag all the way from the back when you can just take another person’s overhead space in the front!

And don’t you just love the people who see your coat and jacket neatly folded in the overhead compartment and then proceed to shove their massive carry-on right on top of them? Classy! I love to arrive at my meeting looking like I slept in my clothes!

And I particularly admire the folks with the massive carry-ons that don’t actually fit in the compartment, forcing the staff to run around trying to find somewhere to stow them. Not before trying futilely to shove them into the compartment while breaking the door, of course!

But the best was the lady on Bahamas Air, who arriving late, opened the overhead compartment, removed my and my wife’s stuff, handed them to us, and put her own bag in the compartment before definitively closing the door! I guess she figured that Bahamian citizens have priority when it comes to overhead compartment use…must be a law we weren’t aware of down there.

What goes through peoples’ heads? Strangely enough, I’m sure each and every one of these people has a perfectly logical (to them) justification for their behavior.

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